The Rainbow-虹(英文版)

第67部分 (第2/7頁)

d　stormed　ideas；　she

corrected　and　nagged　at　the　children；　she　turned　her　back　in

silent　contempt　on　her　breeding　mother；　who　treated　her　with

supercilious　indifference；　as　if　she　were　a　pretentious　child

not　to　be　taken　seriously。

Brangwen　was　sometimes　dragged　into　the　trouble。　He　loved

Ursula；　therefore　he　always　had　a　sense　of　shame；　almost　of

betrayal；　when　he　turned　on　her。　So　he　turned　fiercely　and

scathingly；　and　with　a　wholesale　brutality　that　made　Ursula　go

white；　mute；　and　numb。　Her　feelings　seemed　to　be　being

deadened　in　her；　her　temper　hard　and　cold。

Brangwen　himself　was　in　one　of　his　states　or　flux。　After　all

these　years；　he　began　to　see　a　loophole　of　freedom。　For　twenty

years　he　had　gone　on　at　this　office　as　a　draughtsman；　doing　work

in　which　he　had　no　interest；　because　it　seemed　his　allotted

work。　The　growing　up　of　his　daughters；　their　developing

rejection　of　old　forms　set　him　also　free。

He　was　a　man　of　ceaseless　activity。　Blindly；　like　a　mole；　he

pushed　his　way　out　of　the　earth　that　covered　him；　working　always

away　from　the　physical　element　in　which　his　life　was　captured。

Slowly；　blindly；　gropingly；　with　what　initiative　was　left　to

him；　he　made　his　way　towards　individual　expression　and

individual　form。

At　last；　after　twenty　years；　he　came　back　to　his　woodcarving；

almost　to　the　point　where　he　had　left　off　his　Adam　and　Eve

panel；　when　he　was　courting。　But　now　he　had　knowledge　and　skill

without　vision。　He　saw　the　puerility　of　his　young　conceptions；

he　saw　the　unreal　world　in　which　they　had　been　conceived。　He　now

had　a　new　strength　in　his　sense　of　reality。　He　felt