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leep unless a clean napkin in a certain way was placed under my head; which napkin I called “an ear。” To this day I have dim recollections of crying bitterly until this “ear” was brought to me。 Also I was stupid。 Indeed; although she always indignantly denied the story in after years; I remember when I was about seven my dear mother declaring that I was as heavy as lead in body and mind。

I fear that I was more or less of a dunderhead at lessons。 Even my letters presented difficulties to me; and I well recollect a few years later being put through an examination by my future brother…inlaw; the Rev。 Charles Maddison Green; with the object of ascertaining what amount of knowledge I had acquired at a day school in London; where we then were living at 24 Leinster Square。

The results of this examination were so appalling that when he was apprised of them my indignant father burst into the room where I sat resigned to fate; and; in a voice like to that of an angry bull; roared out at me that I was “only fit to be a greengrocer。” Even then I wondered why this affront should be put upon a useful trade。 After the row was over I went for a walk with my brother Andrew who was two years older than myself and who; it appeared; had assisted at my disfiture from behind a door。 Just ain street; I think it is Westbourne Grove — at any rate in those days Whiteley had a single little shop not far off at which my mother used to deal — there is; or was; a fruit and vegetable store with no glass in the window。 My brother stood contemplating it for a long while。 At last he said:

“I say; old fellow; when you bee a greengrocer; I hope you’ll let me have oranges cheap!”

To this day I have never quite forgiven Andrew for that most heartless remark。

After all it w

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