new moon(暮光之城-新月英文版)

第15部分 (第3/7頁)

allow；　white　except　for　the　purple　circles　the

nightmares　had　left　under　my

eyes。　My　eyes　were　dark　enough　against　my　pallid　skin　that—if　I　were

beautiful；　and　seen　from　a

distance—I　might　even　pass　for　a　vampire　now。　But　I　was　not　beautiful；　and　I

probably　looked　closer　to

a　zombie。

As　if　he'd　never　existed？　That　was　insanity。　It　was　a　promise　that　he　could

never　keep；　a　promise　that

was　broken　as　soon　as　he'd　made　it。

I　thumped　my　head　against　the　steering　wheel；　trying　to　distract　myself　from

the　sharper　pain。

It　made　me　feel　silly　for　ever　worrying　about　keeping　my　promise。　Where　was

the　logic　in　sticking　to　an

agreement　that　had　already　been　violated　by　the　other　party？　Who　cared　if　I

was　reckless　and　stupid？

There　was　no　reason　to　avoid　recklessness；　no　reason　why　I　shouldn't　get　to　be

stupid。

I　laughed　humorlessly　to　myself；　still　gasping　for　air。　Reckless　in　Forks—now

there　was　a　hopeless

proposition。

The　dark　humor　distracted　me；　and　the　distraction　eased　the　pain。　My　breath

came　easier；　and　I　was

able　to　lean　back　against　the　seat。　Though　it　was　cold　today；　my　forehead　was

damp　with　sweat。

I　concentrated　on　my　hopeless　proposition　to　keep　from　sliding　back　into　the

excruciating　memories。　To

be　reckless　in　Forks　would　take　a　lot　of　creativity—maybe　more　than　I　had。

But　I　wished　I　could　find

some　way　I　might　feel　better　if　I　weren't　holding　fast；　all　alone；　to　a

broken　pact。　If　I　were　an

oath…breaker；　too。　But　how　could　I　cheat　on　my　side　of　the　deal；　here　in　this

harmless　little　town？　Of

course；　Forks　hadn't　always　been　so　harmless；　b